Wednesday, February 18, 2009

the blog of all blogs...

ok so i have come to realise that the whole blog thing seems to be going through a bit of a slump... i fear facebook and twitter seem to have taken over so i thought i would take one for the team and do a little blog message... well more of a little update and some interesting information!!

This weekend Claire and Dale came to visit. It was great to see them and spend some time with them. We went to some old abbey place on Saturday which was great cus claire enjoyed all the boring abbey history stuff and me and dale just had a laff... photos to come (see claire!!)

Last night i co-led a safe&sound evening... it was great, the group that came were all really nice and it was generally just a nice evening... untill i realised i am now the responsible mentor for like 5 different people... but thats ok cus i am responsible you see!!!!!

ENCAPTURE youth church starts 4th March which is actually really really really soon. Me and a guy from the CofE church are creating a non-denominational youth church... like an actual church!! - great, amazing opportunity and experience but trying to do this ontop of a fulltime degree and youthwork job is quite intense!!

Claires wedding is getter closer and closer and she gently reminded me that i am incharge of the hen do (so if you have any ideas please dont forget to email them to me!!!!!!)

Beth (my house mate and generally good friend) is moving out in may to get married and all that stuff so i am currently in the process of finding as many things to prevent this from happening as i can... hahaha!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

skiping christmas...

so last night i watched a film called "christmas with the karmons" or something like that. And basically the story goes that they skip christmas and this got me thinking... skipping christmas... it sounds fantastic... controversial but fantastic!! This couple didnt get invloved in any aspect of chirstmas... they brought no tree, no christmas calender, put up no decorations, brought no pressents, sent no cards... they simply wanted to skip christmas. However, they found it extremly hard to do this because of the people around them... their friends, neighbours who all expected christmas to be the same as last year.
At this time of the year i can be known for being a bit of a scroodge... im not a particular fan of christmas... or what christmas has become... yea its ment to be about remembering jesus birthday and all that jazz but is it really... how much of the day do i spend thinking about god? praising god? There has been a thing recently about how society has got into the habbit of calling christmas xmas... completly taking christ of it...
So this year im taking a different angle... im not coming back to essex for christmas this year... im guna spend time reflecting on the real meaning of christmas... im going to put christ back in christmas... christmas this year isn't going to be about pleaseing everyone else its guna be about celebrating jesus being born!!!

Friday, December 05, 2008

new addition

just want to draw your attention to the right hand side of my blog at my "friends that blog" list... a new addition is ian - the advent blog.
Take a look its awesome!!!

Sunday, November 09, 2008

all i want is a box that fits me!!

So who am i then? recently as part of my essential 2 programme i had to fill in a mcquaig personality test thing. It took me ages to fill out so i thought it might actually be benificial... like the more these things know about you the more they seem to be correct - well thats what ive found in the past anyway!
However i got the results back on friday and i was actually quite excited... i wasnt convinced they'd be perfect but i was really anticipating a nice little tidy box that they'd put me in that i would be able to say "hey i fit into this box". But actually what i found was that i hadnt fallen into a box, well that i had but it wasnt the right one. The majority of the statements they came out with couldnt be further from the truth. For example one of them was that my natural instinct was to be organised and manage my time effectiffly, but that couldnt be further from the truth... i have to work really hard at being organised and still havent grasped how to manage my time effectivly! so i gave my line manager a copy and asked him to read through bits of it to see what he thought and without me saying anything he asked me if i was the one that had filled it in! - so since friday ive been throwing around some ideas about why this could be... ive come up with this so far... That i dont know who i am so i filled it in to the best i could but because i am unsure of who i am a mixture of answers went down whcih produced a mix up box for me to fit in! - but then that would meen that in order to find out who you are with one of those questionaire thingys you first need to know who you are, which surely defeats the whole point of doing it!!

Friday, November 07, 2008

what was and what wil???

Have i reached 'what will'?
in my about me section i have preveously wrote i am floating around somewhere between what was and what will. So my question today is 'have i reached what will'?
when i wrote it i as literally in no-mans ground, i had finished what i was doing and my new thing hadnt started yet. So techniqully if i was looking at it like that then yes i have reached the 'what will' but then im faced with will there always be a what will? are we always floating around somewhere between what was and what will? but how can we be when there is a present? or is it just me not excepting my present? i dont feel like ive reached what i was waiting for yet so does that mean im still in no mans land?? surely not.... im living the present, yes and i am waiting for what will and reflecting on what was so maybe.... i dont know... where am i?

Friday, September 26, 2008


wow its been so long!

what to blog about... isnt it funny how when you get out of a routine of doing something its hard to get back into one!!

This year i have set myself the target of reading the whole bible. Yes its a bit extreme... but actuallly i dont think it is!! My knowledge of the bible is actually rubbish and so i really do think it will be so benificial espessially as one of my modules at uni this year is the history of the old testiment. However, i started this mission yeasterday and managed to read the first 7 chapters of genesis. I was very pleased with myself. But i have come away with so many questions... who was cain's wife???

anyway, i am growing up. I am. Yes i think so. People say so. Do they? Am i? Should i be? I am now officially a univeristy student and A youth worker... does that mean ive grown up?? i could have done both of these things last year, so am i any more grown up this year as i was last year? does being a youth worker or a student meen i hve to be grown up?? Well, yes. A youth worker is an actual proffessional occupation. HAHA!! Im professional? yes i am. people say so. do they? am i? should i be?

Becoming a church planter. Yes this year i will be planting a church. HAHA, im planting a church!!

the ability to date. This year i am aloud to have an intimate relationship with a member of the opposite sex. I am no longer under the ruling of essential1 and am young, free and single. However something i found a few months after entering this phase of my life is that the opposite sex were much more fun when i wasnt aloud to be with them than they are no i am!! - i was much more interesteed last year then i am this year... all because i was told i couldnt!!!! - how true is that statement about loads of things in life??!!!

Saturday, August 23, 2008

"why do you do what you do?... what do you do again??"

"Why do you do what you do?... what is it you do again?" these statements came at me in a conversation i was having with a drunk guy the same age as me recently. over and over again he just kept saying "yeah but why" (i never knew who frustrating it was until it was done to me!!) he didnt understand why i didnt drink, why i walked around the street at midnight chatting to young people, he didnt understand why i didnt do crack, he didnt understand why i was bothered.
"why do you do what you do?... what is it you do again?" i absolutely loved the conversation and although he was slightly drunk his statements have stuck with me ever since!! Why do i do what i do? he also kept saying "yeah but your 19 you should be going out getting **(drunk)** and **(having sex)** with some fit guys. your 19 you should be having fun, loving life, free and easy" And i agree with him, well to a certain extent. i am 19 (thats a fact btw!!) and i should be going out and having fun, enjoying life.
So why do i do what i do? Because i believe in a god that created me, not by accident or mistake, he created me intentionally. I believe that god has purpose for my life. I believe that there are people out there that god also created intentionally, for a purpose but for whatever reason dont realise it. I believe that my god is a god emotion. He loves me more than i could ever understand and i believe that my god would want all the other people out there to realise his love for them. I believe the best thing i could do is recognise and worship my god. I believe through my relationship with my god i am saved when i die and i also believe its not my call to keep this to myself.
I do what i do because i dont see that i cant.